Coming out (1/2)

What is coming out?

Coming out is the process of telling people that you are gay. It's often referred to as coming out of the closet. The closet represents the hiding of your sexuality. A person that chooses to hide their sexuality from everyone is often referred to as 'being in the closet'.

"After being with my girlfriend for a while I decided to tell my parents that I was gay. They were fine with it. I feel as though maybe my mother isn't pleased about it, but she's coming to terms with it. My father's really fine with it. They both treat me the same and nothing's changed. I'm still their daughter and I've been accepted for who I am." - Rebecca

Coming out as gay can be complete, also know as 'out to everyone'. This means that you tell most people and don't generally mind who finds out. Alternatively, coming out might be limited to a few people, perhaps just family and close friends. Remaining closetted doesn't mean a person can't have a romantic and sexual life, but it is restrictive and involves a level of deception and secrecy that I believe is limiting, lonely, and prevents gay individuals from thriving.

Benefits of coming out

"Right this minute I'm thinking about coming out at college, but I don't think I will for a while at least, but I don't really mind who knows any more and I like who I am - I actually like being gay, so it shouldn't be too awful!! Anyway, if someone asks me I'll admit to it, apart from that, well we'll see." - Fina

How to come out

"I was very nervous but I made myself do it. My mum was in her room and I said 'Mum can i talk to you' then I told her I was gay, and she smiled and hugged me for ages and said 'I love you so much'. Then I told my Dad and he was so fine with it I couldn't believe lol. I had the best night sleep that evening because it felt like a huge weight had been taken off me and the knot in my belly I had felt for so long was gone. I feel like a new person, I feel like me now. Believe me I know how hard it is not just to come out but to admit you're gay to yourself, but I would strongly recommend it because everyone needs to be happy. I'M PROUD OF WHO I AM." - Eddie

"It took a few days to prepare myself, my Mom has a short temper and I never really bothered asking about her views on the subject, but when I did I got a fairly shocking response. Mom: 'So you're bisexual.' Me: 'Yep.' Mom: 'Me too.' She wasn't kidding." - Alvi

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